People simply don't learn enough about each other before they slip on the wedding band and say, "I do." They fail to ask pre marriage questions about serious issues like money, children, spiritual beliefs, personal history, and so on.

Asking the right pre marriage questions will help you decide if you've truly found "The One." Although there hundreds of issues we could cover here, let's start with the basics:

1. Do you really love one another?
You might answer, "Of course!" However, it's easy to confuse infatuation and lust with love. Infatuation and lust are selfish emotions, while love--true love--is selfless.

2. Do you share similar goals?
Suppose you want to buy a house in five years, yet your partner only seems interested in living for the moment? Your goals might be incompatible, and it's best to get these things sort out well before you marry.

3. Do you want children?
If you don't want children, make sure your partner is of the same mind--and vice versa. Many couples have split up over issues like this, all because they failed to ask this important pre marriage question: "Do you want to have kids someday?"

4. Do you share the same beliefs?
Marrying someone who believes the same way you do is easy and safe. However, if you're able to respect each other's religious differences, you can have a good marriage. You should never marry someone with the idea of converting them.

5. Do you "fight fair?"
It's one thing to argue, and another thing to fight. Fighting without looking for a solution is destructive. Being disrespectful when you fight will also kill your relationship.

6. How do you handle money?
It's worth knowing how your partner handles money so that you'll be well prepared for any financial conflicts. If you find out they're spendthrifts or miserly scrooges, at least you'll be prepared for whatever comes.

7. What are your vices?
Nobody is perfect, but there are character flaws that you don't want in a mate. If your partner is prone to violent outbursts, drinks heavily, takes drugs, or has a history of cheating on their significant other, that's a big red flag.

It takes courage to ask pre marriage questions like these; most of us would rather close our eyes, trusting that love will find a way. However, it's wise to follow Benjamin Franklin's advice regarding marriage: Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.