Firstly, if you are devastated and all shaken up by your breakup, pull yourself together. Calm down and get a hold of yourself. You can think a lot better with a clear mind and calm heart. Secondly, do not resist the breakup. There is something obviously wrong with the relationship that caused the breakup in the first place, so allowing the breakup to happen allows you to take a step back and evaluate it. Whether you can get back with your ex-boyfriend a lot depends on what you do for the next few weeks.

Here is what needs to be done. You need to reinvent yourself. I don’t mean buying expensive clothes or getting an exorbitant make over. Those things are not wrong and if you wish to do that, you can but that’s not the most important thing. It’s more important to evaluate your character and behavior and see what changes need to be made. As far as you can, remove or reduce your character flaws, especially those that contributed to the breakup in some way. Get a friend you can be accountable to. Set specific personal projects that will help you overcome certain character flaws. If you have a bad temper, a sharp tongue or a bad habit, take steps to eliminate it by doing the opposite. Sociologists say that it takes at least 3 weeks of consistent practice at something to make it become a habit.

During the 3 weeks or so, do get some exercise and take care of yourself physically. Good physical health makes you feel better and puts you in a better frame of mind. This is also part of reinventing yourself.

If you want to get back with your ex-boyfriend, you need to know what makes men tick. Believe it or not, physical looks and sex are not the main things that turn men on. They may provide the initial attraction but if that’s all your boyfriend is interested in, you’re most likely wasting your time with him. I’ve had my fair share of arguments and misunderstandings with my boyfriend. And through the process, my boyfriend has taught me what makes a man feel good. And this is something that is true across the board for all men.

The main thing that makes a man feel good is admiration. Along with admiration comes respect, for you can only admire someone you respect. My boyfriend taught me that the worst thing you could do to a man is humiliate him because humiliation is the antithesis of respect. Have you been guilty of making your man feel small or bossing him around or opposing him in public? A man will be attracted to the woman who gives him the most admiration and respect that he needs. What does this mean for you and how does this help you get your ex-boyfriend back?

Showing your ex-boyfriend that you are the woman who can give him the admiration that he needs better than anyone else is the surest way of getting back with him. Showing admiration can be done in various ways like words of affirmation, encouragement, congratulations, praise, thanks, support and so forth. Look for ways and opportunities to express these things. You could say it, write it, text it or show it in some way or other. I’m not advocating flattery. Your words and acts of admiration ought to be sincere. The more you do it, the more your ex-boyfriend will be drawn to you.

Combining your own personal change with your show of admiration is the best way to getting back with your ex-boyfriend.